Baby steps.

I have a really bad one track mind. 

So now that Charlie and I are "working" on things

 I want to move forward.

I guess I want to move too fast.

What is too fast when you have been married for 3 years?

I just want to feel back to normal.

Charlie not so much.

Lets just remember that he had "some one" else.

So he isnt adjusting as fast.

He tries to say its my fault. I did it.

I cant handle that. 

I never wanted to lose my husband. 

I never wanted to be alone.

But what do you do when the man you love treats you like dog shit?

What do you do when you cant even recognize your husband?

Your family and friends are rallying around telling you that you need to leave
Its not gonna get better, he needs to see what he is losing.
I was hurt. I wasnt thinking....I was just so hurt inside.
So I left.

I guess with him it wasnt the right thing.
He says that was the opposite.

Ok maybe I was wrong.
I was so hurt and confused and I just didnt handle things right

But I want to do things right...now.
I want to make things right.
I want to be happy again
I want to love him again.
I want him to love me again.

In order for those things to happen...

we are taking baby steps.

And I am goingcrazy.

{lol}