I am so hurt and angry right now I am physically shaking.
Shaking because I am so betrayed, hurt, sick, frustrated, ashamed...ugh so many reasons.
I loved him. I loved him so much. I shouldnt be so angry but I am...I am so fucking pissed...I dont think anything has ever come close.
So you know how I have mentioned the whole Charlie situation and how he has made this whole thing out on me. Im the bad wife...Im the mean one who "took his kids" "took his family"...
Damn straight I did and at this moment...I think that is the SMARTEST thing I could have done.
My children dont deserve this and I sure as hell dont deserve this either.
This whole fucking time..this whole time. He has lied to me..to my family making me look like this piece of shit wife that left and took his kids. Familys split all the time...they take breaks, work on things, work on getting better for the future. Its just what troubled married couples do. It happens ALL THE TIME.
I tried. I tried my damndest to make things work. I called him all the time to update him on the kids (that he hardly asked about) update him on the pregnancy and how all my dr appts went or if I didnt feel well( he never acted like he cared) told him how much I loved him and how I wanted things to work out. Cried to him when he would yell at me and accuse me. Carried our twins for as long as I could, took care of our boys the best I could with little help from him.
Took every lecture from family after he repeatedly told them I was cheating on him. On our anniversary I wished him happy anniversary and made him a cute video of us...and he screamed at me all night.
I went into preterm labor TWICE because of him. Delivered our twins at 34 weeks alone because of him...
Thats why I filed for divorce. I couldnt take the pain anymore, and the drama he caused before and after my twins were born. The labor I went through delivering our twins...without him.
After all that kind of blew over and he was "begging" my family to talk to me about our "family" so I took him up on it. He blew me off. Screamed at me told me how horrible I was and hung up on me...
Well it all makes sense now. He had a gf. This whole fucking time he has had a girlfriend.
Blunt ass lied to me and said he was his buddies gf when we went up there to take the kids to visit and pick up some of their things.
I cant fucking breathe right now.
He's immature. Young. Doesn't realize how he is effecting his kids for the rest of his life. Drop him. Change their last names. Cut him out. He'll come back eventually. And when he does, kick him in the ass.
ReplyDeleteLol that sounds amazing. I didnt really have to cut him out tho..he pretty much did all that himself. He will be getting the kick in the ass tho ;)
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